Friday, April 29, 2011

Working Again

Two falls ago, I decided to return to school and work towards my M.A. I have been a fortunate person in many ways, not the least of which being the fact that my wonderful wife was willing to continue working while I went to school. This isn't to say that I haven't worked at all; the company that I worked for previously has, on more than one occasion, hired me back as a temporary worker. Right now, even as I'm weeks from graduation, I'm sitting pretty with a temp job that may turn into a full-time position again in the near future.

And yet.

My degree will be in drama, which is different from a degree in performance (though I had aspirations towards actor training, there seems to not have been an MFA program in the country that would teach me).* My degree work has been primarily reading plays and writing about them, which I have enjoyed very much and has actually provided some training for potential jobs in the theatre world.

Part of my reasoning in going to grad school was to move on from my place of employment (which is by no means a bad place; it has been terrific to work for), but now that I'm working for them again with a much higher pay check than I'd likely get working to follow my dreams, I am again reluctant to take necessary next steps (such as looking for internships, other dramaturgical job openings, subsequent schooling to be a stronger candidate for a university teaching job, or my pet dream of owning and running a theatre). At the ripe old age of 28, I have turned into an old man, rubbing my hands together and immersed with concerns about compound interest and considerations about value versus growth.

And yet.

There's a piece of me that doesn't want to give up yet. I'm not sure which part of me is going to win.

*Boohoo, boohoo.

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